Lawdy Lawdy Lawdy.

Posted on August 19, 2010 by Jeffersandwich

Oh my! You must have missed me my little Diatomites! (New name for you readers, I’m trying it out. You like?)

“Yes! We miss suckling on the sweet nectar from the teat of your internet udder!! Come back to us!”

HAVE NO FEAR. I’m right here.

I leave for college on Friday, and honestly all of August has been a huge downer, or at least it seemed like it has been. I suppose I wasn’t ready to make the leap just yet, maybe I was generally scared of the whole order. Granted I still am, but things are looking up. I just found this new confidence in myself that I haven’t seen in a while. Like I feel like I have superpowers again. All I’m missing is the big “J” on my chest. I wear a cape already. What? You don’t? …Freak.

I guess it’s nice when your life turns around and you can look at things optimistically. It’s a beautiful thing.

Sorry I was upset in that last post.

No more of this emo stuff.

Love, Jefferson.

I have been listening to this band, nonstop, for like two days now. Probably why I’m so happy.

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What is happening to my body?!

Posted on August 12, 2010 by Jeffersandwich

Sometimes I feel like the only person on the planet with problems. I feel like being 18 and and being black, and being an artist, and being semi-smart, and being somewhat in the know, makes me more of a minority than normal. I feel like sometimes doing the things I do, like riding my bike and taking pictures for fun, are really indie. Then again, I kind of am. I don’t play guitar, I play the Kaossilator. I wear beanies, and snap back hats. I listen to Justice and Modest Mouse. I can rap, and I can sing. I can make things rhyme and I can write poetry. All these things are useless facts about a single person in the world, who happens to live in America, and just maybe on the east coast, and even still, in Virginia and furthermore has a blog, that should be kept up more often. But they only remain useless until someone specific reads them, takes them in and finds some value in them. Why would anybody want to know that I can pull my upper lip over my nose? I don’t really know where this post is going. Look at this instead.

Sorry. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.




Tee to the Hee




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“Gilby’s Big Adventure” or “NYC Trip”

Posted on August 4, 2010 by Jeffersandwich

Normally when going on a trip, you are supposed to know some of the details before you go on said trip, so you are able to pack, figure out what you are going to do on the excursion, plan out your itinerary, the basics.

Welcome to the exception of that rule.

Approximately two weeks ago, my Dad told me that we would be gone on the weekend after next. Confused, I simply agreed, assuming it was just another one of my Father’s heavily planned, family vacations, which normally led to me,

Sleeping off boredom,

Permanently affixing my headphones onto my ears,

or,

Habitually getting in some body of water.

So the night before, (Thursday) He told me what to pack. I brought the basics, clothes, shoes, and toiletries. But he also asked me to bring a suit. Curious? OF COURSE I WAS.

Then I notice, My step-mom and my sister are resting easy. No bags. No running around looking for hair products that are “Oh so essential”.  So then he tells me,

“Oh, it’s just you and me.”

CLEVER DEVIL.

Build it up like It’s a family trip then don’t tell me it’s not! AH-ha! I’m wise to your ways!

Don’t think you’re clever!

But he was.

Little did I know that, 13 hours from then I would be on a train.

To go to New York City, for the first time.

To see “Avenue Q” in an underground theater.


There was no poster for it. Deal with it.


To avoid the smell of the Halal outposts.

To see Times Square with my own eyes.

To make kids jealous at the sight of my sneakers.


Teehee.


To ride the famous subway system.

You may be saying to yourself, “Dude, It’s NYC. Who cares. I’ve been there like a bajillion and one times. It’s no big deal.” Well to me it was. To me it was more than just a trip. It was more than a three day adventure. It was more than one of the greatest times in my life. It was spending time with my dad. It was becoming more than father and son. I like to think of it almost like in, “Star Wars: Return of the Jedi” When, Darth Vader throws the Emperor off the balcony into that never-ending, space-pit after he electrocutes Luke, and you kinda are given enough evidence that there is still some love left in Darth for his son. Or whatever.

Thanks Dad, For being my Vader. I’d join your Darkside any day.

Hi-Def Photoset: Flickr

Other Photos: Click Here, and Here.

Posted in Life, Traveling | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment

How to Be a Photographer in 2010

Posted on July 27, 2010 by Jeffersandwich

Greetings and welcome to Jefferson’s Guide to Photography in 2010!*

You say you want to be a photographer, and that’s great! You wish to be counted amongst the great shutter-snappers of the past, adjusting and perfecting til you get the absolute perfect shot, but thankfully in our generation, you don’t have to! We have digital film now! So you can snap away at all the seemingly meaningless shit we have surrounding us!

Finally you can upload your photo diary to Photobucket and Xanga and complain effortlessly for ages, cryptically implying that the life of an upper middle class child is “crushing your existence”!

You no longer have to take pictures with your cellphone!

AND IF YOU ARE STANDING UP, YOU HAD BETTER PARK YOUR SWEET ASS IN A SEAT, MOTHERFUCKER!

Because I have a supriiiiise for you!

That’s right! DIGITAL SLR. Look at this insane amount of depth in this image! Just try to fathom what is going on in my oh so painful life!

By now you are probably wondering, “Why am I reading this? I want to learn to take pictures, asshole! Instruct me!”

KEEP YOUR PANTS ON, SHIRLEY.

STEP ONE: Gain a Vagina.

I’m not saying get a girlfriend. I’m saying get a sex change, Johnny Defadude. Guys don’t have the introspective eye or the attention to detail that a human of the female variety does. So stick to football and beer, bro. Fotograyfee Photography or whatever, is for chicks, homo.


My God, this is so romantic.



STEP TWO: Buy a DSLR.

“But I already have a perfectly good camera right here.” SHUT UP WUSS FOR BRAINS. Nobody cares about that wimpy little point and shoot! Yeah? It’s got 12 freakin’ megapixels and a 2.5 HD LCD display? WOOP DE FREAKIN’ HOO! Get that shit outta here. Do you think anybody is gonna respect you with that little piece of crap? Come on! Get with the times! Empty your life savings on a Nikon-no wait. A Canon Rebel! What? Should you buy more lenses? doesn’t the one you have look nice enough?


I'm wondering what it's like in the bug's world. Teehee.




STEP THREE: Learn Discover Attempt to use the Macro Feature.

Wow that mountain landscape sure is a pretty sight. Maybe you should take a picture of it! Nah, fuck it, right? This is a much better time to use that as an out-of-focus backdrop for a picture of your hand. Oh my god… Would you look at the detail in that shot. Phew. You can almost see every single skin cell!


Look how I make insignificant things look significant!

STEP FIVE: Get a Flickr Account.

Argh! One 4GB memory card filled of 2 second exposure shots and enough pictures of you in your bathroom to rival the image server on Myspace, what are you ever to do?! Hang on a second! You’re a big kid now! You can go delete your Photobucket and sign up for a Flickr! Yeah kid! Now you look professional as fuck! Look at all that! There are tons of people just like you out snapping away! But don’t worry, you can set yourself out and make your shots look unique. The secret: Vintage effects. No one will ever see it coming!


Frozen Lamppost. It represents ho we can perpetuate the feelings of remorse within ourselves. Forever. LOLJK


…And shazam! Look at yourself! You should have gauged ears, a headband/bandanna around your forehead, comically large wayfarer glasses that serve no purpose and a new found affinity for Pabst Blue Ribbon Beer. You may be thinking, “How did this happen, Jefferson?! When did I start collecting vintage records and shopping at thrift stores? Where did this mustache come from?” Ahh yes, in time the answers to all your questions will come to light. Just be patient and listen to some Animal Collective on your First Generation iPod Touch.





*I hope by the time you read this far you’ve picked-up on the fact that this is a satire of so called “photographers” I have been inadvertently observing over the past several weeks on image sharing sites. Thanks for understanding. I hope this made you laugh.

If it didn’t, this will.

Simple livin'

Posted in Journaling, Life, Photography | Tagged , , , | 7 Comments

Online Dating.

Posted on July 26, 2010 by Jeffersandwich

I only aspire to be as great of a lover as Carlor.

Online Dating

Posted in Movies, Uncategorized | Tagged | Leave a comment

Tell your Mom I said, “Thanks for the custard.” She’ll know what I mean.

Posted on July 23, 2010 by Jeffersandwich

Going through Family hardships is always tough. No matter what, like they say in the movies, “Every family is dysfunctional!” and then they hug and kiss and watch as the smoldering remains of the Christmas tree disintegrate into nothingness. But it’s alright! They still have each other! YAY TOGETHERNESS!

Bullshit.

Yes, families are dysfunctional. Yeah, we all have problems. But Hollywood has a couple things wrong. Things don’t always turn out right. In fact, they never really ever do, do they? I’ve come to realize that the ever evolving structure of a so called, “Family” has changed so much that, kids these days can become, what I like to call, “Digital Siblings”, with a few clicks on Facebook.

“Hey Jefferson,”

“Yeah?”

“Wanna be brothers?”

“Dude, we met like one time in fourth grade. I really don’t give a shit that FriendFinder helped you track me down and I-”

“FAMILY REQUEST SENT“

“Shit.”

And then we barely talk after that. Even if that guy  “likes” one of my pictures, are we really siblings? Do we really deserve that title? I mean, I have a few, I won’t lie, that I would consider my brothers and sisters, because that’s the way we treat each other.

So I come to terms with it.

Despite the fact that my idea of a “Family” was torn when I was ten.

Besides the point that My brain is trapped in an 18 year old body.

Beyond the truth that The same fate of my childhood, may happen to my kids.

I find solace in the fact that I learned to live, laugh and love, care, forgive, and ultimately, understand life’s great questions early on. So now I have the rest of my years to experience it’s answers.


This is moments before the Winnebago caught fire for the second year in a row.


Awesome.

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“Good luck exploring the infinite abyss!”

Posted on July 23, 2010 by Jeffersandwich




Chris and I Looking at the theater.

Chris M. and myself looking at some theater or cathedral. It's edgy.


In approximately one month, I will be heading out to college. 30 days, and then It’s off to Richmond and into the next chapter of my life. I think it’s going to be fun, exciting and all that jazz, but now I can’t tell if my responses to my friends and families never ending queries of “when are you leaving for college?” are even genuine. “August 21st.” I’d say, robotically. Repeating something over and over, only makes it feel more metallic and permanent, yet I still have yet to feel the situation solidify. Am I afraid? A little. Nervous? Maybe? Anxious? Why so many questions? I’ll take that as a yes.

On one hand, I am at the gates of my newest journey in life and yeah, I am pretty excited. But on the other, I’m at the gates of my newest journey in life and yeah, I’m scared shitless.

I’ll meet new people. So that’s a plus.

I’m rooming with my best friend. Add one in the “pros” column.

Richmond is a great city. Strike three.

I have a possible job at Apple: Yay, Apple.

All my classes are really nice, and timed well. Swish.

I suppose going away to college wont be too bad, not that I thought it would be horrendous. Still though, not knowing what’s going to happen next gives me the strangest sense of excitement and fear all mixed into one.

College makes people cry.

College brings out the nerd in you.

College makes douchebags and douchebagettes, into larger douching products.

But most of all,

College turns students into scholars, professors into mentors, and companions into siblings.

Fuck it. I can’t wait to go to College.

Posted in College, Journaling, Life | Tagged , , | 6 Comments

Footwear Fetish

Posted on July 22, 2010 by Jeffersandwich

It goes without question that I am in love with sneakers. The only problem is, I never really made the leap to buy all the shoes that I wanted. Well that old lifestyle has changed, and today, I made my first leap (not really) into the sneaker game.

Truth be told, I have several pairs of kicks already, but these shoes are special and important to me, because I have wanted them since I first saw them on the internet. These are my first SB’s and I couldn’t be happier. I bought them from my boy, Paolo Del Castillo, from Florida, and three days and a UPS address mix-up later, they finally arrived.

The shoes themselves have a lot of great design aspects besides the super loud colorways. Nike SB always has a great story to back up their designs, and these shoes are no exception.


“Skate or Die” Nike SB Dunk Low Pro

Back in ’91, before I was even conceived,  a game for the NES came out called, “Skate or Die”. The object of the game was exactly like the title said. Shred on your skateboard and do some gnarly tricks.

Fast forward to 2008. Nike’s Skateboarding division is in full effect, and month after month, they release new shoes that fly off the shelves, from hype being built up on internet forums.

These shoes were a general release, but that didn’t stop anyone form doing whatever it took to get their pair. I waited, and waited, and waited some more, and finally, I decided it was time to scoop these up. Not a second to soon, I might add.


“Ms. Pac-Man” Nike SB Dunk Low Premium

Whenever you see “Premium” after anything, you know it’s going to be of great quality, (unless you are buying a steam iron from a mall kiosk…). These dunks are nothing short of that.

Pink nubuck, blue and black suede, and 3M reflective piping, all great ingredients of a near perfect shoe.

In case you couldn’t tell, the colorway for these is also inspired from a retro video game, (Geeks , stand up!) Ms. Pac-Man.

If you don’t know the History of Ms. Pac-Man, you’re doing it wrong.


Another two have been added to the Fleet.

Welcome Home Gentlemen.

Posted in Clothes, Sneakers | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Hello There

Posted on July 22, 2010 by Jeffersandwich

I’m sorry I left. I don’t have much more to say. Let’s do this.

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment